I was nineteen and scanned the wall of boxes for my assigned number. I found it quickly after the other students moved aside. My fingers hastily worked the combination, and I peered through the little window in the box. I could see one, maybe two, envelopes, a couple fliers, and maybe... I swung the little door open and reached inside. Yessss! A pink slip!
 |
| The only picture I took of the entire tour-- the wall of mail boxes. |
"When I was in college," I told my daughter, opening with that qualifier, not for the first time that day, "we got a pink slip in our box if we had a package. Your worse day could suddenly change if there was one of those in your box!" The tour guide continued in her perky tone as I wandered back in my memory.
No bigger than a memo slip, Pepto-Bismol pink, that piece of paper held the power to make an entire day. If I got one, I'd quickly rush to the mail window and hand the worker my slip. Why did she move so slowly? I watched her disappear behind the wall. Anxious students in the queue behind me shifted feet, impatiently waiting their turn, gripping their own amazing pink slips. Finally. She rounded the corner. I glued my eyes on the box in her hands. That was mine!
"Thank you," I said as I took the package, addressed to me in my mother's handwriting. I tucked it under my arm. Half the fun would be carrying it to my next class where I knew other students would stare at it with envy. A box from home meant cookies and goodies to share with dorm mates, maybe a new shirt or pair of earrings Mom had picked up on her last shopping trip, and probably a little cash tucked into a new pair of socks-- a little extra spending money treat. I couldn't wait to get back to my dorm room and rip into it, and yet waiting and wondering what was inside was delicious. In the meantime, there was a letter from a high school friend written on lined notebook paper to read and one from my grandpa written in his slightly shaky hand writing on sheets of white stationery. He and I had recently started exchanging shy letters with each other, and I relished the opportunity to get to know him a bit better.
"We don't do pink slips anymore." The tour guide must have overheard my comment, bringing me back to the present. "Now we will send you an email if you have a package." She smiled at the small group of students and parents.
No pink slip? Where was the fun in that? But then I thought over the four years my son was in college. I sent him packages, but I don't know if we ever exchanged a single, real, hand-written letter. He was more likely to respond to me in a quick text or email than ever sit down and write a real letter. In fact, I could hardly remember the last time I wrote a real letter to anyone. How sad.
I realized, as we walked away from the beloved mail room of my alma mater and on to the cafe, serving lattes and frappuccinos (that wasn't there when I attended this college, I hastily pointed out, yet again, to my daughter) that the art of letter writing was quickly dying. What will future biographers use to research the hearts and stories of people's lives? A transitory email that no longer exists? A text message lost in the cell phone universe? It's all so temporary and fleeting anymore. No longer will there be a box of letters hidden beneath the cedar-scented blankets of a hope chest, a written history of someone's life and relationships. My kids Skype with their long distance friends. We exchanged letters and carefully posed pictures (you didn't want to waste the film on your 110 cartridge by making a funny face).
The campus has changed in so many ways. Most of the changes, including a state-of-the-art music performance hall, and gorgeous new wellness center, are welcomed, a true enticement for future students. But, I thought as I glanced one final time at the mail room before we left the building, I'm not sure all changes are for the best.
Your post has brought back memories I hadn't even thought of in years. I loved the excitement a letter or the "slip" in the mailbox indicating a package would bring. There was such joy and excitement in opening a mailbox. Now it's all junk mail...or (gasp) bills.
ReplyDeleteI think society is losing out on the anticipation of a lovely penned letter or card. Where sweet sentiments are sent across the country or oceans... Making every word count...Not all changes are good, you're right. We are losing a part of our personal documented histories.
I know. It makes me want to write a letter. I admit I'm an email addict. I like being able to jot quick notes and get fast responses. But I can't remember the last time I sat down and savored a long letter!
DeleteI spent the summer I was 17 swapping weekly handwritten letters with a friend. He only lived a ten minute car journey away, but it was forever when neither of us could drive. It was such fun waiting for his letter to drop on the doormat. I miss hand-written letters.
ReplyDeletePS. Did your daughter roll her eyes every time you mentioned 'in my day', because my kids sure do??!
My bestie from high school and I used to talk all day at school, have phone calls that lasted forever and tied up the line, and THEN write huge, long notes to each other almost every night. What we found to talk about so much is beyond me!
DeleteAnd yes, my son and daughter both laughed at me every time I said, "Ohhh that wasn't there when we went here..." My son reminded me several times that it HAD been almost 30 years. Brat.
The last letter I wrote was to my beloved grandmother, a month before she died. Twenty five years ago, she gave me this lovely stationary she brought back from FL. I wrote her one letter a year on that stationary - I have five sheets left.
ReplyDeleteI write to Filly's half brother, he's in jail, at least once a month. Another friend doesn't have internet, and I write him once a month and am sending a copy of Lucky Number Six printed out in booklet form.
And this weekend, I'll send a letter to Filly in South Carolina. She squeals with delight anytime she gets a letter, whether from her own Nanny, or a cousin. I see no reason to send her only emails :)
You have to work anymore at writing letters. It is so easy to go the way of emails, texts, and Skype.
Let me rephrase - the last letter ON STATIONARY** LOL Ugh, now I just use notebook paper LOL
ReplyDeleteI was with you. See? She squeals with a letter in a way I bet she never does with email. There is just something about tearing into the envelope, nestling in some quiet spot and read a letter, folding it up, and maybe rereading it later. I still have a shoe box filled with notes my husband wrote to me when we were dating in college and he sent through intercampus mail.
DeleteI love receiving letters but am afraid it may be a dying art. The sender shares part of themselves in the handwriting. It's personal, so different to texts and emails. Such a pleasure to keep a letter, being able to savour the texture of the notepaper or decorative card. You can appreciate the thought taken, and the respect given to you in the sender's choice.
ReplyDeleteSharon, I agree-- both on the beauty and art of letter writing and on how quickly it may be fading from our world. I think back to the many books I've read on the letters exchanged between artists or writers-- an intimate look at their lives and wonder if that kind of intimate information will be lost?
DeleteOh, how bittersweet. This brought me back to my own college days and the overwhelming joy of getting a lip in my own mailbox letting me know I had a package waiting. They didn't come often and they were by far the highlight of the day whenever I got them. And boy did you capture those feelings here.
ReplyDeleteI tried to start a pen-pal relationship with a friend of mine a few years ago, just to experience the thrill of receiving a hand written letter rather than a bill or supermarket circular in the mail. We wrote back and forth for about a year before it petered out and I admit I share your sentiments about the sad state of correspondence in our world.
Oh a pen-pal thing would be fun. I wonder if people still write love letters and notes? Are those a lost art too?
DeleteLOL, I sent my kids care packages when they first went to college and they finally told me they would rather have gift cards or money so they could pick out their own goodies. We laugh now but I enjoyed putting those packages together while imagining just the reaction you described.
ReplyDeleteSo true, Susan. I think I ended up sending my son gift cards more than goodies. But I still couldn't resist a box filled with some candy or cookies or jerky. It's tradition!
DeleteYou're right. When my mom passed away I inherited all her treasures, including a box full of the letters she'd exchanged with my dad when he was at war (WW II). I still have the letters I exchanged with my husband. What will future generations have?
ReplyDeleteOh wow, what a gift. Do you think you'll ever compile them more formally? I have read some really good books stitched together by letters and journals. There is such a treasure of history and perspective that is preserved through these kinds of insights.
DeleteJulie, I thought of it but decided Mom wouldn't want her personal letter shared outside the family. She was a shy, private person.
DeleteNot all changes are for the best. I agree.
ReplyDeleteMy mom lives 45 miles away. We see each other several times a month, but I still send her notes and cards. There are those that still get one of Sia's slice of life letters. Sadly, not as many as I had years ago. I had a long correspondence list for letters.
Visiting our alma mater with our kids...ah, so many changes--some good some not as good. Glad you were able to and that it brought back the good memories!
Sia McKye OVER COFFEE
Oh good for you Sia. I know my mom would appreciate more notes and cards in her mailbox. She doesn't use email or text. I call her, of course, but notes are such a treat to get in the mail.
DeleteYou're so right!
ReplyDeleteI'm from the UK and didn't attend university so I didn't get to experience that 'pink slip' moment but I do think you're right about letter writing. I remember years ago leaving the area I grew up in and writing letters to my best friend, we exchanged memories and told each other new stories - all hand written. I still have those letters today.
My husband is a programmer and has spent his entire life using computers. When we met we exchanged emails, not letters. He is a hoarder and luckily has kept a copy of all of our early exchanges, they're all backed up and kept in a fire-safe on a disc of some sort. If it hadn't been for him those emails would've been lost.
Like you said, some things don't change for the better. :)
Morgan x
I have one high school friend, Morgan who doesn't use the computer much and will still write nice, hand-written notes. What a gift that you kept all those letters. And how smart your husband was to save all your notes. One of my dear college friends passed away recently and I have saved a few of her emails and even voice calls on my cell phone, unable to let them go, quite yet.
DeleteI too remember the pink slips and the letters from home. This lovely post brought back memories of Michigan State and a much different, sweeter world...
ReplyDeleteI had flashes of memories of things I received in the mail: my mom's packages, letters from home, my dad's letters in manilla envelopes jam-packed with articles he had cut from newspapers, chain letters (an 80s fad).
DeleteWhy can't an email be considered a "real" letter if it is composed as one? On a related note, is there any significant difference between what was often scribbled on postcards and the text messages of today? That is, apart from the coolness of the postcard itself, of course.
ReplyDeleteI mainly use email, Jerry, to communicate with friends and family so for all practical purposes, it is my letter. And the brevity of postcards and texts may be similar but the intents are often different. It's all a form of communication, I agree. I just wax nostalgic for the hand-written letters, rambling sans the benefit of backspacing, and the remains of tangible evidence after. :)
Delete'Tis understandable, my dear Julie.
DeleteI miss letter writing, too. :( In my WIP I'm putting my characters into a situation where they have to write letters. It's been fun. :)
ReplyDeleteOh what a great idea Rachel. Hmmm... now you have me thinking how that could be a game-changer.
DeleteWhat a sweet memory, Julie. I loved the handwritten mail / letters. Now, all I receive in the mailbox are bills and junk mail. Emails just don't have the special touch, do they? I still have the fun-folded love notes from my hubby from high school! Tattered and discolored, but still have them.
ReplyDeleteCandilynn, I still have a shoe box of notes and letters from college from my husband too. My kids will get a kick out of reading them when I'm dead n' gone. I also have journals that may not be as uplifting to read since they tend to be the dumping ground. Letters are much more edifying!
DeleteHow sweet that you saved all yours. ;)
When I was a girl, my best friends and I would communicate through letters. There's magic in it--and there was nothing more exciting than receiving a letter in the mail! Definitely not the same as getting an email. It *is* a lost art--and it makes me sad too!
ReplyDeleteLoved your post, Julie. Well written and engaging. <3
Hi Morgan-- thanks. Speaking of engaging posts, your most recent was very thought-provoking. It's been on my mind all morning.
DeleteI loved letters in the mail too. Now to find the time to act on these thoughts!
I love the hand written letter and have everyone I've ever received. They hold so many memories. I even have the letters I wrote but didn't have the courage to send. I would do that a lot when troubled, or wanted to say something I was sure the other person did not want to read. Now I send my mom, and my sister hand written notes on special occasions, but usually type them other times. I also send emails, but at one time sent typed letters to over 30 family members monthly. I made a new year's eve resolution to communicate with family more. But no one responded so after two years I stopped the monthly letters and went to only Christmas letters. Folks would tell me how much they appreciated it, but no one answered. Not even a card at Christmas. It became painful. It is a lost art!
ReplyDeleteYeah giving and wanting the relationship of correspondence and not having that returned isn't fun. I love that you made the effort though.
DeleteThere are some great therapeutic benefits to writing letters we never send. I should try that!
You are very good at writing your heart, as I've been blessed to know. I'm glad I get your email notes! :)
And don't forget the modern fun of a red flag notification in Facebook! Oh how life has changed. Love your reflections, Julie.
ReplyDeleteOh Facebook is just an entire phenom in and of itself. Thanks for stopping by. :)
DeleteWow, how old I suddenly feel. I write very few bona fide letters anymore. My last was three hand-written pages earlier this year. It was well received and genuinely appreciated. Some things should never disappear.
ReplyDeleteOh what a difference you probably made in someone's life, Jeff and now they have something tangible. I miss the tangible.
DeleteI miss snail mail letter writing. Occasionally, I still send cards, letters that way, but very seldom receive them in return. However, my inbox is CONSTANTLY full. We live in the age of immediacy, not intimacy :-(
ReplyDeleteOh well said, Sylvia, well said.
DeleteOh, what memories of going to the post office to check on the mail.......especially when I was waiting on that one special letter......you know what I mean..... :)
ReplyDeleteMine was box #53 and I'll bet I could still open it. It was so automatic for years!! Thanks for the memories Julie!!!
Oh wow-- you have a great memory! I think mine was in the 600s but can't really remember. As I stared at all those boxes, I wished I could! Yes, so many good memories!
DeleteHow poignant... and how true... :(
ReplyDeleteI've mentioned on my blog that one of the biggest thrills for me over the last few years is corresponding with my old D-Day veteran.
He does do email, but prefers letters and when I see one of those in our mail, I am so the kid again :)
Yes, change is good - but it's not all great.
(You know what we should do is start the Novel Letter Campaign (blogfest!)
One person starts the story, writes a page and mails it to the next person who continues the story and mails it to person #3 - like an old-school chain letter without the sales pitch :)
If we got 250 people to sign up, we'd have a book.
What a novel idea :)
Hi Mark-- thanks for finding your way over here. This has been a fun blog to play with writing styles and topics in an essay format-- not really writing about writing to writers. I've enjoyed it.
DeleteHow wonderful that you will have his letters as keepsakes. I think of all the memoirs, books, and biographies which have pulled heavily from intimate letters. We are losing that resource.
Hmmm-- you may be on to something with the hop! (Quick, call Gary!)